Nursing the pain (2)

“Penyakit datangnya bagaikan ribut,

Perginya bagaikan siput”

(Pain comes like the hail,

And leaves like a snail)

I once came upon this scribbling by my uncle many years ago somewhere in a makeshift phonebook (out of an old diary planner). Judging from what he was suffering at that time (some acute earache), it summed up his ordeal I guess. And this time, I was reminded by it.

This back pain that I’m having, since January, I don’t know when it will completely heal. Today after driving from home for 1 hour and a half to return to my place, I had to endure the pain again & needed to sleep on it in the evening, which I don’t quite like.

Coincidentally, last Sunday there was this article in the newspaper on acute & chronic back pain, with the list of causes & treatments. My condition fits some of those listed in the newspaper. It was after that that we decided to see the doctor again & take the x-ray.

Back pain happens to be among the most misdiagnosed case & it’s very important to identify the real cause as well as the stage / chronology of pain. I read in Health Today that there are 6 stages of back pain. I decided to see the doctor when I figured I was in the 3^rd stage (February).

Well, in retrospect, pain or illness is a blessing in disguise. Like I mentioned before, I have been ‘neglecting’ myself for so long. This pain reminds me that I need to stop when it is actually enough. It reminds me to say no when initially I would feel ‘I can still do it’ for so many times. It reminds me that even though I have the ability, I also have the limits. It reminds me to breathe & relax and not worry about what other people think. It reminds me that the functionality of all those, are dependent on the One Who Creates & ‘Moves’ it all, Allah the Almighty.

It also reminds me of old age :p and that forgetfulness is part of my being/ limit (and of anyone for that matter) but I wish that this would always guide & remind me. It’s hard ‘to forget’ at the moment since almost my every common movement like sitting down or taking ablution is ‘pricked’ by pain. However, it is harder when your decision involves other people, especially at work.

I hope when I’m well (InsyaAllah), this experience would stay in mind. I hope my friends would be able to remind me too and do better themselves. Better posture at work must be given attention to, though I don’t think I’ve ever had any prob in that before but still…

Let’s hope to do better everyday or at least maintain. But better is better, of course…